Welcome to my musings

All The Things I Did Not Say by Perry Pidgeon Hooks

Exploring the places that tend to silence us: the Patriarchy at Work, at Home, at the Doctor’s Office, at the Gym, at Church or at the Car Dealership.

Reflections on the Trip that Didn't Happen

This is a reflection on something universal: what happens when plans change, when life happens, when something you’ve looked forward to for the better part of a year doesn’t materialize.

Ritual or Routine: Help or Hinderance?

What is the difference between ritual and routine? Are they helpful? Or are they limiting? Where do they come from? Why do they matter?

WE the People: Reflections on our 250th

Happy birthday, America. We made it to 250 years—with elegant ideals and imperfect execution. With bold dreams and broken promises. With remarkable progress and painful setbacks. Major milestones require reflection and a reckoning. For me, the concept of WE resonates most at this 250-year mark.

The Deer Was Not a Part of the Plan

Today I share a guest musing from Allison Gustin - who artfully describes one of "those days". It turns out there’s a limit to what a person can calmly handle before dinner time. One of those days where absolutely nothing goes according to plan? Not catastrophically wrong. Just… relentlessly off.

The Space Between: Understanding Polarities, Paradoxes and other Puzzling Things

This musing was supposed to be a book. For nearly a year, I researched, read, sketched models, and filled notebooks with ideas about polarities, paradoxes, and the impact of dualistic thinking on women. Then something unexpected happened.

Change Your Frame, Change Your Game

As humans, we do these three things: We make up “stories” or versions of our truth using only our viewpoint and with limited and biased data. We assume our stories are factual, that we are right. We craft stories that put us in the best possible light. The stories don't always serve us - here is how to know!

Our Language Shapes Our Outcomes: A Story of My Evolution

This is a story about my evolution. Like most forms of meaningful growth, it didn't happen all at once. It unfolded gradually, one lesson at a time. Looking back, I wonder how I could have missed something so obvious for so long. Bottom lines - words really do matter!

No Regrets 90's

That might not sound particularly significant, but sitting around a Pizza Hut lunch table celebrating a coworker's birthday many years ago, it felt as though my co-worker, Cheryl, was crossing some invisible line. The cards mocked aging. The gag gifts joked about decline. The laughter was good-natured, but beneath it I heard a message that troubled me: "Your best years are behind you."I had a distinct emotional reaction that day – one that I first fought against, then found my own truth. And that truth has been a guiding light for me in deep and meaningful ways.

Starting Before You are Ready

In the spring of 2024, I walked away from a secure career with no real plan, no guarantees, and every statistical reason to believe I would fail. In spite of the risks and uncertainties, and against the advice of my work peers, I stepped into the unknown and took a leap of faith. And I learned a valuable lesson about the power of just starting.

Your Race - Your Pace

After far too many half-marathons, I had a flash of insight that fast might not be the most important thing. What if speed is not the highest measure of a meaningful life?

What the River Taught Me: Reframing Emotion as Energy

It was a bright early-summer morning, the kind that awakens you to good things. I set out for an outdoor adventure. There were many lessons that day.Yet one lesson from the rapids did not become clear to me until thirty years later.

Sorry for What? Unlearning the reflex to apologize for competence, confidence, and taking up space

Unbeknownst to those around me, I was keeping an “unofficial” tally. I didn’t share the results with them, but I’ll share them here. Because, as women, it’s something we need to be aware of.

This Too Shall Pass: Both the Welcome & The Unwelcome

I had come to a meeting of business professionals to grow my network. Instead, I gained a powerful insight that led me to examine how I view and navigate my life.

Life Lessons on My 72nd Birthday I was surprised by what emerged!

On my birthday eve, I set an intention to use this birthday to reflect on and share some of the wisdom I’ve accumulated over the past seven decades. That wisdom would be the fodder for this week’s musing. But I awoke with an “oh shit” moment! Nothing had arisen. There were no flashes of insight. No wise, pithy pearls of wisdom. And then I saw my fortune on my Yogi tea bag.

Creating a Bigger Circle: Lessons from the Artemis II Mission

This musing contrasts the divisive rhetoric and fear-driven leadership on Earth with the unifying perspective of the Artemis II mission, reminding us that from space, humanity shares one interconnected home. The crew of the Artemis calls us to move beyond “us vs. them” thinking. What can we do to consciously choose love, compassion, and collective responsibility to help tip the world toward a more inclusive and hopeful future?

Destination or Journey? Moving Past Either/Or Thinking Into Both/And

A purely destination-driven life becomes transactional: work hard, defer joy, stay focused. A purely meandering life risks stagnation or circular wandering. But together? You aim toward something while allowing yourself to evolve along the way.

The Social Scorekeepers - How invisible expectations shape our choices

It was a simple walk that led to a profound insight of how often I allowed "invisible others" to shape my choices.

It Started as a Story: The Unexpected Power of Imagining a Life You Can’t Yet See

I've learned how intentionally writing a vivid story about your ideal future can shape your beliefs, actions, and ultimately your life. In this musing, I share my personal experience with insights from neuroscience, offering a simple yet powerful practice for moving into a more meaningful and aligned way of living

The Tyranny of the To-Do List

Does your to-do list tire you out? Rule your life? Does your to-do list provide terror or tranquility?

Life Isn’t About Balance. It’s About Rhythm.

Life moves in rhythms rather than perfect balance. We function best when we allow ourselves to flow between periods of activity and rest. By noticing when we’ve drifted too far and taking small counter-moves, we can gently shift our momentum back toward a healthier, more sustainable center.

Love Versus Hate: Why My Money is on Love

What if the only force strong enough to overcome hate is love? In this reflection on the Super Bowl halftime show and the movements unfolding around us, I explore why love is not passive or weak — but disciplined, courageous, and transformative. In a divided world, my money is on love.

Knifing Through Frozen Ground: What crocuses teach me about hard conversations, integrity, and voice

It takes courage to emerge before conditions are perfect— to speak with care, to name what is real, and to trust that small acts of honesty can multiply into change.

I Hope You Dance

It’s a frigid Friday night in late January in Indiana. Dark, with a biting wind. I head into my local pharmacy carrying both a heaviness—after 11 days of the flu—and a hopefulness that the prescription I’m about to pick up will finally end this scourge. As I reach the back of the store, I sigh. The line is long. I take my place, preparing for a wait. And then, something completely unexpected happens. And that chance event has completely shifted my perspecive going forward.

Trading Shoes, Changing Stories How Small Acts of Empathy Transform the Way We Work, Lead, and Relate

In this musing, I reveal a deeper truth about how we view others: The surface rarely tells the whole story. When we do shift our perspective and wonder what it is truly like to “walk in their shoes”, we begin to realize: • Most people are doing the best they can — at work and at home. • We all make assumptions and rarely test them. • And we’re all prone to a common mental trap: the actor-observer bias.

Wabi-Sabi Eyes: Seeing Beauty in the Imperfect, Incomplete, and Real

I’ve come to realize there’s a profound difference between accepting imperfection and appreciating it. It’s the difference between seeing something through the lens of a pragmatist versus seeing it like an artist.

Cracks of Light: Why Joy Still Matters in Times of Despair

It’s Monday morning. 7 a.m. I sit at the kitchen table, gazing out at the dawn. It’s not quite light, but no longer dark. This in-between moment holds both the arrival of light and the retreat of night. And later, as the day dims into dusk, the cycle will reverse. This liminal time feels like a perfect metaphor for the emotions surrounding me lately. A reminder that opposites often co-exist — joy and despair, hope and fear, sadness and light. One woven into the other. One fades so the other may rise.

What Do You Most Need Right Now

This question—“What do you most need right now?”—turns my thinking upside down and inside out. Upside down because it asks me to act now, not later. Inside out because it puts the focus on me, not others. That’s why I’ve been keeping this question front and center lately—not to ask others, but to ask myself.

The Power of One Small Thing

It was a disheartening swirl of national and international events, layered with the emotional weight of walking alongside two loved ones through difficult personal struggles. Maybe it wasn’t just about last week. Maybe it was the culmination of many weeks, even years, of striving to maintain a hopeful outlook in the face of growing division, hatred, and uncertainty. But something broke open in me. I felt despair in a new and deeper way. I was tired. I was angry. I cried more than I laughed. Hope felt elusive. And then, in the midst of that darkness, two memories surfaced—bright and vivid. Both examples of how one small thing made a big difference!

Shedding What No Longer Serves You

Shedding isn’t about drama or grand declarations. It’s not about throwing everything out or starting over. It’s about discernment — gently letting go of what no longer serves.

The Art of Saying No

Are You a Victim of Sacrifice Syndrome?

Discover the hidden cost of “sacrifice syndrome” — the pattern of giving endlessly while neglecting yourself. Learn how renewal restores clarity, joy, and sustainable service.

Grace Amid the Gloom: How Gratitude and Gloom can Co-Exist

Discover how gratitude and grief can exist side by side. Learn how a simple daily gratitude practice can bring light, balance, and grace—even through life’s gloomiest days.

Ambiguity Abounds: Learning to Live with Uncertainty is Critical

It’s been a hell of a day. I’m finally seventy miles in the air on a flight to D.C., then on to Indy — finally being the keyword.I’d spent the day in Savannah, Georgia, wrapping up a client’s strategic retreat. The plan was simple: finish by 4:30, get to the airport, and two-hop home to Indy by midnight. That was the plan — until it wasn’t.

Four Mindfulness Practices Anyone Can Do

If you had asked me ten years ago if I had a mindfulness practice, I would have scoffed at you. That stuff was for folks cloistered away in a religious community. It was for those that had quieter days, less to do, fewer responsibilities.

The Radical Act of Simplification

Simplification isn’t about doing less — it’s about focusing on what truly matters. This piece explores how stripping away the unnecessary can bring clarity, energy, and impact to leadership and life.